Do I Take One of Those Stars That They’ve Earned Already?

Have you been wondering what to do if your little one decides to turn into the naughtiest little kid on the block suddenly? Do you take one of those stars that they’ve earned already, out of the Star Jar?

The idea behind the Star Jar is to acknowledge good/desirable behaviour, not to punish. So while it’s completely up to you (and sometimes extremely tempting!), we would suggest keeping all the stars earned inside the jar until they reach their Star Jar prize. It can help serve as a visual reminder (for both you and your little one) of how well they were behaving and earning stars before today.


Well, the idea is to keep the focus on the positive actions your little one has been doing and because they have already earned that star for behaving well. It’s not something that should then be taken away for naughty behaviour after.

The Star Jar is also a way for us parents to have a visual reminder for when things are getting tough that there ARE actually times when our children have been well behaved. And that we should be focusing on how many stars are in the jar rather than focusing on their naughty behaviour. The Star Jar can allow us to refocus and help them earn another star instead.

This refocusing is something I’ve personally found helpful and I hope you do too!

Keep it positive and keep an eye out for opportunities to reward them with a star. They will remain interested and you’ll find that over a period of time they will start looking for ways themselves to be rewarded for “star-worthy” behaviour.

step star jar earned stars

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